Painkiller A University Story
by Inuyoshie
Summary: A sweet girl wanders into the rain village with complete amnisia of her past. All she knows is that she's a good medic. But trouble arises when her past comes back to haunt her... ItachiXOC, DeidaraXOC, has a yaoi in it so be warned. Please review!
1. Chapter 1: Things of great interest

A University Story (Painkiller)

Chapter One: Things of great interest

Kusuriko University is the best school a hopeful medic can go to. It'd make the Ivy League look like a decrepit old shack full of dumbasses, it was that good. Generally, t here was more boys than girls at the school, but if you have enough money, anyone (with a good record, grade point average and all of that fun stuff) can get in.

Unfortunately, if you can't cough up 100,000 yen a semester, it's a no go. Sadly, Kari Naishi barely had enough money to pay the rent of a small apartment nearby the university. But, she got a job at a nearby hospital, and amazed the personnel there. This Kari girl seemed to be a medical genius! But whenever anyone asked her about her past, she would just shake her head. She had absolutely no recollection of her past. She was even surprised that she remembered her medical skills.

On e of the top surgeons pulled a few strings, and got Kari to take an entrance exam. Her score was off the charts, so the university couldn't turn her away. So, Kari got into Kusuriko University completely free.

Nagari is the official name for the largest town in Amegakure. Because Pein is viewed as God among the people, any Akatuski can roam the streets. In fact, they're hailed as angels.

Itachi Uchiha and Kisame Hoshigaki had a favorite bar, Will You Join Us?. Actually, it was more of Kisame's favorite bar; he just dragged Itachi along for the hell of it.

Itachi was sitting in the bar, trying to ignore the loud drunkenness of the idiots around him who don't understand the concept of going easy on the liquor. Glancing over the bar, Itachi spotted her.

She had long, golden hair that veiled her face delicately. She looked barely legal (at least 18), but she held herself so tall and proudly in the middle of a noisy bar... this struck Itachi. He just stared at this mysterious golden-haired girl until a bartender shook him out of his reverie.

"I didn't know you had an eye for the ladies, Uchiha-sama," he remarked with a lusty wink. Itachi shrugged.

"Who is she?" Itachi asked casually.

"That is Kari Naishi. Complete amnesia of her past, but she's a genius when it comes to medical stuff- she made it into Kusuriko on brains alone," the bartender gossiped with a hint of awe in his voice.

"Hn," Itachi replied, not bothering to hide the hint of interest in his voice. She was kinda cute…

Two boys in fancy suits came into the bar.

"We're looking for a Kari Naishi," one boy shouted out into the bar. Kari sighed, set the book she was reading and turned to face them.

"I'm right here. What do you want?" she demanded, her soft, musical voice ringing through the now silent bar.

"We want you to get your slutty ass out of Kusuriko, or Father will kick you out," the first boy yelled at Kari.

"Yeah, go back to the streets you filthy white trash!" the second boy added nastily. Kari bit her lip. Those words were so cruel… she didn't even know these people! Putting on a brave façade, she rolled her eyes.

"You interrupted my reading for that?" she demanded crossly, turning around to resume her reading.

"You filthy bitch!" the second boy yelled, running over and grabbing Kari's hair. "Say you'll withdraw!"

"Hey momma's boy! Where'd you learn your manners, a pig pen?" came the voice of a rather pink-haired konoichi by the name of Sakura Hanero.

"Huh?" one of the rich boys asked, confused.

"Get our, before I smash your noses into the backs of your non-existent brains!" Sakura yelled at them. Both boys gulped, nodded, and dashed out of there without another word.

"Hey you OK?" Sakura asked Kari, now calmed down.

"Yeah, thanks," Kari replied shyly, letting her aggressive façade slip.

"I'm Sakura Hanero, and I 'm from Konkohagakure. Who are you?" Sakura asked.

"I'm Kari Naishi, and I have no memory of where I'm from. I just went where I felt like going, and ended up here," Kari explained.

"Ahem."

Sakura turned around to see that Itachi was right behind her.

"Hn? Oh… here," Sakura said to Itachi nervously, handing him a white scroll. Itachi took the scroll, glanced it over, and then threw it back. At this point, Itachi glanced up and noticed that Kari was staring at him. Her wide, deep blue eyes met his cold, indifferent indigo ones and held, and this time it was Itachi who couldn't look away. Finally, he smiled a bit, and tipped his hat to Kari.

"Pleased to meet you Kaishi," he commented politely (freaking Sakura out).

"Likewise," Kari replied, equally polite, bowing her head. Itachi walked over by his drunken partner and was for once, glad that he was forced to come to this bar. That Kari girl seemed interesting…

"Who was that?" Kari whispered to Sakura urgently.

"…that was Itachi Uchiha. He's psycho," Sakura answered, wondering why Kari was so interested.

"He's psycho? Why?" Kari demanded.

"That guy massacred his entire clan… except his little brother," Sakura explained sadly, thinking back to said little brother.

"Ah. He didn't' seem psycho… just… very well guarded, that's all. Kinda cute too…" Kari remarked.

"Um Kari… Itachi's a _murderer._" Sakura repeated.

"He's not killing people right now," Kari pointed out. "He seems very polite,"

"Hmm… just be _very _careful. Uchihas have a tendency to be nasty on women," Sakura warned Kari.

"You know?" Kari asked.

"Yeah… I loved Sasuke, Itachi's little brother… until he joined Otogakure," Sakura explained. Kari blinked. Sasuke… Uchiha…older brother… Otogakure… Konohagakure… these words sounded familiar to Kari, as if she had been listening to a conversation behind a locked door, and couldn't exactly hear all of it. Memories? Maybe… but just too damn fuzzy. Not enough clarity…

Kari kept on staring off into space and blinking. Sakura watched Kari quietly, wondering what was going on in her head. Was it sudden memories? Was it Itachi? Sakura bit her lip nervously. This semester may be interesting.

"Sasori... you've got yourself a problem," Itachi told Sasori in a bored voice as his stood in the doorway of Sasori's room.

"What is it?" Sasori grumbled, looking up from his puppet.

"A Konoha nin. Is in your medical college you like so much," Itachi informed Sasori, keeping his bored tone.

"Hn, I'll keep an eye on him-"

"Her," Itachi corrected.

"Whatever. Go away," Sasori grumbled. Kisame stuck his head in.

"Hey Itachi…. What about that Kari chick? You looked interested in her, and I heard she goes to the same university…" Kisame trailed off meaningfully.

"I thought you were drunk," Itachi muttered in disbelief.

"Heh, my eyes see all…" Kisame said, mock-mysteriously.

"I'm wondering if you still are," Itachi mumbled under his breath.

"Hmm… that makes things interesting. I suppose I can get some information on this Kari girl… maybe even an address-"

"I am NOT a stalker!" Itachi cut off Sasori. The ex-Suna nin. Merely raised an eyebrow.

"But you'll never get anywhere with her unless you make a move first," Kisame told Itachi, exasperated.

" Sasori, Kisame, it is a BAD idea to play matchmaker," Itachi growled dangerously.

"Why not? Deidara and Tobi do it all the time," Sasori pointed out. "Plus, it's amusing,"

"Screw you all," Itachi grumbled, stalking out of Sasori's room. Kisame grinned widely.

"Oi… this is gonna be SO much fun…"


	2. Chapter 2: Forgotten Bags and

A University Story Chapter Two

Chapter Two: Forgotton bags… and other things!

"I'm gonna throw all of Sasori's crap into a bin of termites," Itachi muttered murderously, trudging down the street with a really heavy bag in his hand.

Sasori found out that Kari Naishi 'conveniently' left her book bag at the university. Itachi personally wondered if Sasori had arranged for Kari to get called to the office right before the bell rang just so that she forgot her bags. ( He'd do that too.)

Unfortuately (for Itachi) Sasori sent Deidara along with Itachi to make sure that the transaction was completed.

" Sooo… you finally got a girl hmm?" Deidara adked Itachi slyly.

" No," Itachi said coldly.

" Come ON, Itachi-san un… is she cute, yeah?" Deidara asked Itachi annoyingly.

"…" Itachi grumbled, staring at the sidewalk. Due to the fact that he wasn't looking where he was going, he ran into someone.

Someone with deep blue eyes and silky gold hair- only it was in a ponytail.

"Kari?" Itachi asked, tilting his head to one side. Something didn't seem right…

" Uh… no. Kari is my sister," the strange girl murmered softly, turning a bit red when she shlyly looked at Deidara.

" I didn't know Kari had a sister," Itachi mused, staring at the slip of paper that had Kari's address.

"Uh…"

" Actually, that's a boy, un," Deidara told Itachi scornfully. " Don't you have any observational skills, hm?"

"I'm not the one who goes around staring at peoples' chests," Itachi defended himself coolly.

" Uh… do you dnow where my sister is?" the strange gi-no boy, asked. The two criminals stopped bickereing to stare at him.

"Uh…yeah…I've got her address and am heading to her house-"

"Why?" the strange boy demanded suddenly.

"To give her her bag back," Itachi finshed.

" To aske her oukt on a date, un," Deidara corrected.

"NO!" Itachi snapped at Deidara.

" Uh.. could I follow you two?" the strange boy asked.

" Sure, un!" Deidara replied cheerily, glad to have an excuse to hang around this cute boy longer.

"Thank you. I am Kani Naishi." Kani introduced himself. Itachi and Deidara.

"Sooo… what kind of guys does Kari like, hmm?" Deidara asked casually. Itachi shot Deidara a death glare.

"Uh, psychotic assholes," Kani replied, thinking back with a grimace to Kari's ex-boyfriend.

"Great,un! Itachi-san's best for the jub, yeah!" Diedara exclaimed, slapping Itachi on the back.

"Shut UP brat!" Itachi growled, thrkough his teeth. How the hell can Sasori stand this kid?

" Quit trying tok sound likeDanna un… you're too young. Plus, you won't get any good girls if you act like him, un." Deidara retorted.

" You're married?" Kani asked Deidara, a twinge bit dissapointed. Deidara was cute…

" Nah, I'm single un," Deidara assured Kani. Kani ducked his head to hide his blush. Deidara was most likely straight anyway…

The three bishonen turned the corner and knocked on a door. Unfortunately, Sakura had ben studying with Kari, and answered the door.

" What the hell-"

" Kari left her-"

" What the hell is Ino-pig doing in the Akatsuki?!" Sakura demanded, pointing at Deidara.

" Did you just call me a pig un?" Deidara demanded, his eye twitching a bit.

" Oh wait… you're a guy, aren't you? Sorry…" Sakura tailed off, feeling a bit embarrassed.

" We'd like to see Kari," Itachi told Sakura in a bored monotone. Kari peeked from behind Sakura and noticed that Itachi was there, and had her bag.

"Oh, you have my bag! Thank you! I didn't know you went to the university, Itachi-san," Kari remarked, taking the bag from Itachi.

" Uh… a friend of mine does," Itachi muttered under his breath, figuring it wouldn't be a good idea to tell her that he worked for God and one of his coworkers ran the univeristy.

" Can I get you all some tea?" Kari asked Itachi and Deidara.

" Only in amegakure can you invite a bunch of S-class criminials into your house for tea," Sakura muttered, shaking her head.

" We'd like some tea, thank you," Itachi answered, ignoring Sakura's comment. The three filed in and sat on the couch that Sakura and Kari were studying on. K ari also sat on thes couch while Sakura made tea.

" Uh… Kari?" Kani asked tentatively. Kari looked up at Kani and tilted her head to the side in confuxement.

" Yeah?" she asked. This guy looked familiar… Kari didn't even know how she knew that he was a guy… she just did…

" You don't remember anything, do you?" Kani asked Kari. Kari nodded.

" You seem familiar…" Kari mumbled.

" Yeah… I'm your twin brother," Kani told Kari. Kari stared into the tea that Sakura had made in confusion. A million emotions bounced around in her head.

" You are?" was all Kari could say. Kani was shocked. He was expecting a 'Hey there little bro' reaction, but this/? Mabey… withour any other influances on Kari, she was reverting to her real self- an encredibly shy and confused little girl trying to save her brother from a monster…

While Kani deliberated with himself, Itachi found the silence unnerving. Well… Deidara's constant nudging didn't help either.

_So… say something… what do I say… _Itachi thought tko himself. Unfortunately, eh said the first thing that was on his mind.

" Can I take you out todinner… Kari?" Itachi blurted. Kari blinked, turning bright red as Itachi stared intently at her, expecting an answer. He wasa slightly pink too, but the way he said it made him sound cool, like he's done this a million times before.

" I didn't know you were so blunt, " Sakura remarked, wrinkling her nose at the ex-Konoha nin. Itachi clenched his jaw and turned away. How the HELL did THAT come out?

Kani looked worried. Was there going to be a relpeat of last time?

Kari had two pressing issues. One was Kani. The other was Itachi. Kari chose to deal with Kani first.

"Uh, kani.. you can stay at my hourse," Kari told her brother softly.

" Thanks," Kani replied, feeling a bit more relaxed.

" You shoulden't tell Kari everything about her past right away- it may cause some psychological shock," Sakura warned Kani. Itachi nodded, thinking back on Kani's remark about Kari's psycho asshole ex. He was also glad to be off the topic of dating.

Deidara on the other hand, wasn't done.

" Okay un, so Itachi-san and Kari-chan will have dinner tonight-"

Itachi and Sakura palmed their foreheads.

" You'reabout as subtle as Naruto, ya know that," Sakura told the bomber crossly.

" Well, if he hadn't said it, nothing would've happened!" Kani pointed out.

" Exactly un," Deidara said happily. " I've already made it cool with Sir Leader. He says 'good luck and don't kill her' un,"

Itachi got a kunai out and attacked Deidara. Deidara hid behind Kani.

" Hey, no using innocent bystanders as human sheids!" sakura yelled at Deidara.

" Hey un, we ARE anti-heroes un. You people keep on forgetting that un," Deidara giggled jokingly.

" I swear I am going to kill you as slowly and painfully as possible," Itachi vowed angrily.

" Uh…" Kari spoke up. Kani looked worried. Yup, Kari's gone completely shy…

" Yo! Quit trying to kill my brother!" Kari shouted angrily at Deidara. Kani smiled. This was more like the Kari he knew.

Kari felt dizzy. That sudden outburst wasn't lik her. Her head throbbed and pounded as images flickersed across her vision of leather straps and I.V.s and screaming people. The room tilted and spun before Kari lost consiousness and toppled onto the floor. Itachi stepped over to catch her soundly before she hit the floor and hurt herself.

" So.. you'll be here at six or so?" Kani asked. Itachi sighed in deafeat, placed Kari on the couch and laid his cloak on top of her before nodding and leaving.


	3. Chapter 3: A Date Gone Wrong Part 1

A University Story

Chapter Three: Date Gone Wrong Part I

" Soo… what are you going to wear un?" Deidara demanded of Itachi as he was digging through his closet furiously.

"Clothes," Itachi replied coolly, throwing a shirt at Deidara's head.

"I could get Sasori no Danna to make you some, un," Deidara offered.

"HELL NO! He'd make something maroon and frilly," Itachi snapped.

"What's wrong with maroon, hmm? It matches your eyes yeah,"

"I'm NOT gonna be using my Sharingan- unless it's on YOU!"

Deidara took the hint and left- but Itachi still had the problem as to what he was going to wear. Hidan stuck his head into Itachi's room.

"Hey, what the fuck is with all the noise?" he demanded.

"What do you wear on a date?" Itachi asked Hidan coldly. Hidan looked at Itachi oddly.

"You mean to tell me that you're not fuckin gay? Damn, I'd better watch out! Now I thought I told that fucking godless heathen Kakuzu to get me a suit for the annual Festival of Death!" Hidan growled, stalking off.

Itachi sighed and walked out of the room.

"A hint? Pleeeease?" Sakura whined. Kani looked unsure. Sakura batted her eyelashes… and was… flirting with him.

"Uh Sakura-san… I'm… uh… I'm gay," he told Sakura meekly. Sakura turned bright red.

"Jeez… don't I feel like a bitch," she muttered. "Sorry,"

"That's OK… Kari had a boyfriend before. He abused her, and she didn't want to leave him. This guy is better." Kani explained.

"B-but he's-"

"–better than Kari's ex.," Kani finished.

"Ouch. I take it you didn't like Mr. Whatshisface at all…"

"Nope."

Warm hand gripped Kari's sides tightly- so tightly that it almost hurt, but they were strong, safe. She was shaking, crying, and voices mumbled complaints around her-

And then she was dressing. She HAD to wear this dress, because it was his present… and it was pretty. Kani was upset and telling her something, but she wasn't listening, too happy to think straight, filled with an intoxicating joy that came with seeing his face smile at her…

Kari woke up on her couch with something large, dark and warm covering her. Kari sat up, and realized that it was Itachi's pretty cloak, with swirly red clouds on it. The cloak was warm, comfortable and smelled strongly of cherries, cinnamon, nutmeg and a touch of smoke.

"Kari! You're awake!" Sakura said cheerfully, sitting next to Kari on the couch. "Uh… you're shaking,"

"Hmn…" Kari mumbled, pressing her face into Itachi's cloak. Sakura sighed. Kari had it baaad…

"you should get dressed. Itachi's coming over in an hour and a half." Sakura informed Kari. "And, I've asked my friend Ino to help do your hair."

"Itachi-san's coming-"

"Date, remember?" Sakura prodded, ushering Kari into the bathroom.

"By the time Kari was out of the shower, the Ino person (who looked a lot like Deidara) had arrived.

"So… what do you intend on wearing?" Ino demanded, after surveying Kari for a bit.

"Uh… clothes?"

Around six o' clock, the doorbell rang. Kani answered it promptly.

"Oh, hallo Itachi-san! Kari!" he called behind him, before rushing off to his room.

Sakura, Ino and Kari stepped out of Kari's room and stared at Itachi. He was in a black tuxedo, with a bouquet of what looked like paper roses (curtsey of Konan). Ito stared slack-jawed at Itachi. He looked like an older, yummier version of Sasuke…

Itachi stared at Kari. She was wearing a strapless black dress with silver beads sewn on it in the shape of a Chinese dragon. Her golden hair was put up in a bun, and a chunk of it was hanging down loosely, slightly curled. Kari still wore gloves.

"You look nice," Itachi mumbled cautiously.

"Uh… so do you," Kari responded, twirling her bang nervously.

"Well… shall we go?" Itachi asked, successfully raising the mask of 'gentleman' when in all actuality he was nervous as hell. Kari nodded, and the two stepped outside.

"Was that guy-"

"Yeah, that's Itachi Uchiha," Sakura answered Ino.

"I hope it goes okay," Ino nodded, and noticed Kani sneaking out with a camcorder and giggled.

"Typical little brother… wait, that is a guy? Right?"

Whew! Finally got that one typed up! Date Gone Wrong Part Two coming soon! Please review!


	4. Chapter 4: A Date Gone Wrong Part 2

A University Story (Aka: Painkiller) Chapter Four: Date Gone Wrong Part 2!

Itachi sat in front of Kari (and a plate of dango) and tried to calm down. Konan had suggested 20 questions for the first date (especially considering that this one was pretty much a random hook-up bordering on blind date), and Itachi had no other ideas.

"Uh... what kind of books do you like to read?" Itachi asked.

"I like mysteries... especially Stephen King," Kari replied. "You?"

"I enjoy Stephen King novels too. Especially _Misery_. Itachi responded."

"I haven't read that one, "Kari remarked. "Could I borrow it?"

"Sure. Where did you get your dress?" Itachi asked, hoping Kari would catch on.

"Uh… Whatshisface gave it to me," Kari answered. Itachi felt his heart sink. She had previously dated people?

"Whatshisface? Who is that?" Itachi asked carefully, hoping that this wouldn't provoke a flashback.

"My apparent ex-boyfriend. I don't remember his name, so Sakura-chan calls him that," Kari replied. "Next question?" Itachi smiled a bit.

"Alright... why do you always wear gloves?" Itachi asked, indicating the black riding gloves Kari always wore. Kari took one glove off, and placed her hand onto the wooden table. Little sprouts of maple started uncurling and shooting up by Kari's hand. Within a few minutes, a miniature foot-high tree was in the middle of the table. People around the couple clapped and cheered and oohed.

But Kari wasn't doing so well. Loud noises slammed into her ears, distorting and sounding like someone yelling at Kani to touch it, touch it, come on brat just do it! Kani didn't want to; he thought dead bodies were icky. Someone slapped Kani, which pissed Kari off. He's your little brother you should-

"Kari, are you okay?"

-protect your little brother you're-

"Kari I'm taking you home-"

-the older sister, you should be STRONGER and you're WEAK and you should save Kani from him-

"KARI!" Itachi yelled at her. Kari blinked.

They were outside, and it was raining.

"You fainted," Itachi explained.

"Oh," Kari replied, taking a shaky step. Itachi sighed and picked Kari up.

"I'd better take you home," Itachi told her racing off into the misty, rainy streets of Amegakure. Kari let Itachi carry her, tryi9ng to ignore the cold clamminess that had enveloped her. Her dreams had more images of people hurting Kani and her, only now in training for shinobi work. She drifted in and out of consciousness for about an hour, no wanting to leave her warm bed. (Vaguely part of her wondered how she got there or where her dress went)

Kari was shaken awake by Itachi, who whispered to her that he had to go or he'd get his butt kicked.

"I'll see you soon," he promised Kari, who looked blearily concerned. He then leaned forward and kissed her gently on the forehead. "Try not to faint too much,"

Kani ran into Deidara while sitting underneath the restaurant window, near where Itachi and Kari were sitting.

"Hey, whatcha doing here un?" Deidara asked softly.

"Uh… watching Ane-san," Kani responded, tapping the camcorder.

"Hehe… I've been taping Itachi-san since he left the base un. If I can get a kiss out of them yeah… blackmail1" Deidara whispered excitedly. Kani grinned and aimed his camcorder at the couple. Kari was showing off her plant-y touch... Kani clucked his tongue.

"My sister is an idiot. I wish she wouldn't show off so much," he grumbled. Deidara raised an eyebrow.

"It's not like Itachi-san's gonna recruit her or anything un," Deidara pointed out.

"Old habits die hard," Kani mumbled back.

"Ah shit, un," Deidara growled. "It's raining un, and they haven't kissed yet, un! Damn you Pein yeah!"

"It'll happen eventually," Kani assured Deidara. "Plus, they're probably going back to our apartment, so I'll try to catch 'em… but we'll have to hurry. They're already a block away."

Kani put his camcorder back in its pouch and took off after Itachi and Kari, not noticing the puddle… or the piece of paper…

Deidara watched in horror as Kani slipped on the wet paper, and winced as he heard Kani's head crack on the pavement.

Kani lay there, flat on his back with his beautiful cobalt eyes wide and his golden hair wild around his head like a halo. Deidara bent over and picked Kani up, cursing to himself.

"Nnn... Kani mumbled, pressing his face into Deidara's chest. "Owwwww…" Deidara turned a little pink and gripped onto Kani as he raced off towards the Akatsuki compound.

"What do you want, brat?" Sasori demanded of a dripping wet Deidara, who was holding someone bridal-style. Deidara simply showed Sasori Kani, now with blood turning his golden hair orange.

"Tch…"Sasori grumbled, and then stared at Deidara, a look of surprise on his face. Deidara was shaking.

"Sasori no Danna…" Deidara whispered, holding out his hand.

His hand mouths were gone.

"How did that happen?" Sasori asked, now curious.

"I dunno hmm! As soon as I picked Kani up, skin grew over them hmm!" Deidara whined. Sasori walked over by Kani cautiously.

"Hmmm… brat, go see if Zetsu has a spare body," Sasori ordered Deidara. Deidara gave Sasori a curious look, but complied and came back later with a corpse. Sasori set the corpse next to Kani, so that Kani's hand was touching the corpse's forehead. Then Sasori checked the corpse's neck.

"This body was definitely dead… and now it has a pulse. This boy must have some odd form of healing powers… I'll have to study him or turn him into a puppet-"

"NO HMMMM!!" Deidara yelled, grabbing Kani and leaving. Sasori chuckled to himself and started working on turning the newly animated corpse into a puppet.

"Thank goodness we don't have classes on Saterdays," Kari mumbled aloud, after she had showered and was making coffee.

"KANI! I'm making breakfast!"Kari yelled out, pulling out eggs to make an omelet.

There was no answer.

"KANI!" Kari yelled louder, getting more nervous. She walked over to Kani's room and opened the door.

He wasn't there.

Kari made herself breakfast, trying not to imagine all the bad things that could've happened to him. Around him, Kari's memories were kind and gentle. They didn't hurt, like the memories from her university classes. And if they were gone…

Kari sighed heavily and picked up the phone.

Kani woke up on his back. He felt something compressing his head, and it was cold, which irritated him. Kani tried to sit up, but a hand gently made him lay down.

Deidara's head appeared above Kani's.

"Hey un," He said calmly. He then held up his hand. "Do you mind explaining this?"

"Explaining what?" Kani asked, confused. Deidara sighed.

"I used to have mouths on my hands, un. They're important for my jutsu-"

"You're a ninja?" Kani interrupted.

"Yes…un… Can I continue un?" Deidara asked tiredly.

"Who do you work for?" Kani asked, suddenly suspicious.

"Can't tell you hmm. Can we get back to the topic of discussion? You made my hand mouths disappear," Deidara told Kani. Kani bent his head down.

"I'm so sorry, Deidara-san. I didn't mean to… it's just… whenever I touch anything, I heal it. It must be some kind of kekkai genkai… sometimes I re-animate dead things… Kari can heal small animals, minor injuries and plants. I heal larger animals, and dead things," Kani explained.

"Well, why didn't you tell me hmmm? And will my hand mouths come back?" Deidara asked.

"Yeah, there's probably just a layer of skin over them," Kani assured Deidara. He then felt his head. "Thank you for helping me."

"Its no biggie un. You should be more careful- you almost brained yourself," Deidara told Kani more cheerfully. Kani cracked a smile.

"Uh… can I sit up now?" Kani asked, blushing a little.

"Sure un,"

Kani sat up slowly, and stared around him. He wasn't in a hospital, or in his own room Deidara was still on the bed next to him and wasn't wearing a shirt. Kani blushed a little more, and looked at his lap shyly.

Deidara leaned over and fingered Kani's hair.

"I hope it doesn't stain orange un," he mumbled softly.

"It won't," Kani assured Deidara calmly.

"You've been hit on the head before hmm?" Deidara asked, concerned.

"It's nothing," Kani dismissed Deidara.

Suddenly, Deidara stood up. He hunted around his semi-messy room until he found where Kani's camcorder pouch was. Inside it, his cell phone was ringing. Deidara handed it to Kani.

"Hello? Hi Kari! Yes, I'm still alive; I just hit my head… oi… Kari, calm down… uh… maybe... oh, FINE, yes I was, and you caught me. But the camcorder broke when I fell, so you're safe (Kani winked at Deidara)… talk to Deidara-san," Kani handed the phone to Deidara, who listened, went 'mhm' and grew paler by the minute. When he put down the cell phone, he was white as a sheet.

"Y-your sister's fricken scary un! She could make Sasori no danna crap his pants un!"

Then, Deidara picked up the camcorder and searched the memory.

"I wonder what else is on here hmm," Deidara muttered, hitting play on another video recording.

On the video was Kari, in the same dress she wore for Itachi's date. She was smiling and laughing and hugging (and occasionally kissing) a young man. A young man with silver hair and glasses…


	5. Chapter 5: Finding Work

A University Story

Chapter Five: Finding Work

By Inuyoshie

"Hey Kani! How are you doing?" Kari called to her brother as she and Sakura returned from classes one day.

"I got a job!" Kani exclaimed happily. "I can help you with the rent now!"

"You don't have to, you're my brother! Plus, we can make by with what I make!" Kari exclaimed, looking worried. "You shouldn't over work yourself!"

"Uh, Onii-chan, you work eight hours at the hospital, attend university classes for four hours, work two hours at the bar, spend two or three hours with either Sakura-san, Itachi-san or me, which leaves seven hours, which you spend three hours studying leaving you only four hours of sleep-"

"Uh, Kani, you need to breathe. Breathing is a little important for living," Kari interrupted her brother's rant.

"Even if you do sleep! And I don't do anything-"

"You cook, clean, do dishes, sweep, mop vacuum, and who else knows what- but wait, where did you say you were working again?" Kari asked.

"A bar. Official bartender… I make as much as you do at the hospital, so we can live off of something besides instant ramen," Kani responded. Then, he remembered something. "Crap, Onii-chan, could you fix Deidara-san for me?"

"Blonde person, friends with Itachi-san?" Kari asked.

"Uh yeah... I accidentally healed something he needs," Kani admitted.

"Oh you can heal people too?" Sakura asked.

"Well, if I were to touch a dead person, they'd live again," Kani told Sakura sadly. "I'll call Deidara-san,"

"Okay… I've gotta be at the hospital in ten minutes," Kari admitted. "I'll ask for some time off,"

"Yeah, and I've got training to do," Sakura added. "So… I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Sure! Wanna catch a movie?" Kari asked. Kani palmed his forehead.

"Sorry, I can't. Naruto somehow talked me into see a movie with him," Sakura grumbled, rolling her eyes in an exasperated manner.

"See ya later!"

Kani was wiping down the booth he was at when Deidara came in.

"Deidara-san! What are you doing here?" Kani asked, a little pleased that he showed up.

"Eh, I heard you were here, yeah, and decided to keep ya company un!" Deidara exclaimed happily.

"Okay… are your hands feeling better?" Kani asked.

"Yeah, un, Sasori no Danna fixed 'em un," Deidara replied coolly, ordering a light beer. "He'll be pissed to find out that I was drinking un,"

"Oi, do you TRY to get yourself killed?" Kani demanded of Deidara, putting a hand on his hip.

"I don't generally plan on it, un. It just… happens, yeah," Deidara replied, taking a deep swig of beer.

"Kani sighed, watching the people around the bar.

"Looking for someone?" Deidara asked, mildly concerned that Kani was scanning for some girlfriend.

"Nah, just a habit. It's good to know your surroundings," Kani assured Deidara.

"Oi, un, you sound like a shinobi, un," Deidara murmured, observing how Kani stood on guard, his beautiful azure eyes scanning each and every person in the bar. Then, he came around to where Deidara was sitting and sat next to him, tightening the pony tail his hair was in.

"Yo, is Itachi around?" a random guy with a large bottle of sake in his hand demanded.

"No, un," Deidara replied sharply, ready for anything. Well… almost anything.

"Good. No I can get in on the action," he said, grabbing Kani from around his waist and kissing him on the lips. Deidra's hands were clenched, and he already had some clay ready-

"Sorry to break it to you, but that's Kani, Kari's brother," came the calm voice of Itachi, who was behind this drunken man. "Now get OUT,"

The drunken guy rose and left, cursing all the way. Deidara glared daggers at the man's back, and soon as he was out of the bar, Deidara discreetly released a clay bird.

"Katsu, fucker, un," Deidara hissed murderously, reveling in the BOOM that could be heard from outside the bar and the screams of innocent bystanders.

"Was that necessary?" Itachi demanded, hoping to get a shot in at the asshole.

"Yes, un," Deidara replied testily.

"Did you just blow that fellow up?" Kani asked softly, getting behind the booth again.

'Yes un. Can I have another?" Deidara asked, indicating the empty bottle.

"Sure, and you, Itachi-san?" Kani asked Itachi politely.

"No… I don't drink," Itachi said coldly. "Deidara, don't drink too much. I don't want to carry you home,"

"Don't' sweat it, un, only one more yeah," Deidara assured Itachi, who didn't exactly buy it (or care)

Kani sighed and played with a bottle cap for a while. Deidara ordered another beer. People came and went. Itachi asked how Kari was doing… typical stuff.

That is, until someone new entered the bar. A new person by the name of Kabuto Yakushi.

Deidara found it interesting that he was here. Itachi didn't (currently) give a damn. But Kani…

"Take it and leave my sister the hell alone. On the house." Kani told Kabuto politely, shoving a beer in his hands. Kabuto blinked.

"Kani? My, my, I guess we finally found you! Is your dear sister here?" Kabuto asked friendlily.

"Leave my sister the hell alone!" Kani responded, his voice suddenly cold.

"So she is here… I wonder where I could find her…"

"Tch… I say that to you every time I see you, that doesn't necessarily mean she's here," Kani growled, inwardly kicking himself for letting that slip.

"True… but you can't seem to go anywhere without holding your sister's hand I don't know why she puts up with you…" Kabuto trailed off meaningfully.

'… 'Cuz she's my sister, and she loves me," Kani said firmly.

"Pfft. Right, sure, how about you go along and believe that… I'm just looking for my girlfriend," Kabuto sniped at Kani, who suddenly got an evil idea.

"Your girlfriend? Excuse me? I'm pretty sure Kari dumped you before leaving Otogakure… and anyway, her new boyfriend will probably kill you," he said loudly. An uncomfortable silence stretched through the bar, and all eyes were on Itachi. Itachi stood up, stalked over by Kabuto, and shot him The Uchiha Death Glare. Kabuto just narrowed his eyes and turned to Kani.

"Oh, I see. Well, who's YOUR girlfriend? Or should I say… boyfriend? You were always so terrible with girls… it's pathetic,"

Kani bit his lip at the verbal assault. Oi… Kabuto is more of an ass than Kani remembered…

Itachi was annoyed by Kabuto's jabbering (and Deidara, who was grinding his teeth in the background) and sighed.

"How about you take your beer and LEAVE before I tell Sasori that his favorite spy has come back, alright?" Itachi asked his voice dangerously pleasant like poisoned honey. Kabuto sighed, took the beer and left. (AN/ He's probably wondering why he has a beer…)

Kani sighed in relief and walked back over by the bar. Itachi looked vaguely concerned.

"You two know Kabuto?" he asked.

"Yes," Kani replied softly, clearing three beer bottles from by where Deidara was.

"And he dated Kari?" Itachi prodded on.

"Yeah uuuunnn…. We've got it on tape," Deidara told Itachi cheerfully, slurring his words.

"Ai… Boss… I'm taking Deidara-san back to his house," Kani announced.

"Hai," his boss replied. Kani hoisted Deidara over his shoulder and dragged him out of the bar. As soon as Kani and Deidara left, it occurred to Itachi that letting Kani go practically alone to the Akatsuki base wasn't quite a good idea…

"Hello?"

"Who is this?"

Kani looked up confusedly at the tall man with a Venus flytrap on his shoulders, one side of his face black, and once side white. HE smiled, baring sharp teeth at Kani, who gulped.

"Um… Deidara-san is sick…" Kani mumbled softly.

"Speak up girly, we can't hear you," the weird man said.

"I think Deidra's drunk," the weird man added in a robotic monotone.

"Sasori! Hurry up and kill Deidara so we can eat him!" eh man cried over his shoulder.

"Yes… and the girl…"

Kani ran away from that place extremely quickly, even with a larger man on his back. HE sped all the way to Kari's apartment, laid Deidara on Kari-s bed and then sat on the foot of it, still processing what had just happened. Kabuto was here. He's going to want Kari back, Itachi or not. And, Orochimaru's going to want both of them back, for their healing abilities. This was bad. Very, very bad.

Inuyoshie's After the Chapter special of doom.

I'm so sorry for taking so long!

I've recently gotten sucked into Bleach. Yes, that is my excuse. Fan fiction for Bleach will be coming out momentarily (like in several months from now)

On a further note, I'm probably going to discontinue My Hallucinations of You, unless someone gives me a brilliant idea and the plot bunnies kick me rapidly again.

But in this story, the plot is thickening! There's more romance! And possibly… man fights! Oi… I love man fights…

Push ze button! Review this sucker! Pweese!


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